Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Disguised Blessings

I have a question: why do blessings wear disguises? I would really like to know why a blessing feels the need to wear a trench coat in its approach, causing fear and anxiety. Lately, I have been wondering about these new disguised blessings: my position ending on June 1st, my crush getting married (Darn you, Jason Stratham) and not having a new position yet. I keep hoping these “blessings” would toss off there Groucho Marx glasses and reveal their exquisite beauty and grace.

I am reminded of Jacob wrestling with the angel. He demands that the angel bless him. Well, he blessed him all right! Jacob got a limp and a name change. I guess that is the strange nature of blessing, like a beautiful untamed beast. It might bite you, but it will be worth it for the ride. This makes me wonder what exactly the nature of these current disguised blessings is.

I try to think about similar situations in my past, times of terrible uncertainty. There was always a lesson and a gift that demanded my faith. Can I have faith that God is doing something miraculous and impossible in my life? Certainly God has done it before. I can look around my life and see those points of grace and blessing that wore unusual or even threatening disguises. One is staring at me right now with big brown eyes from her exersaucer.

So I guess the question really is: am I ready to wrestle? Can I trust that the blessing will be revealed in all its beauty and terror? I certainly hope so because the match has all ready begun.

7 comments:

Maureen said...

I'm right there with you girl...waiting for blessings in disguise to reveal themselves. I do believe that God is always doing something miraculous in our lives. But God has a habit of doing it on Godtime, not our time. Pffffttt!!
Frustrating...isn't it?

Sending prayers of love and support as you await and continue to search for your blessing.

Muthah+ said...

just found your blog. Love the whole thing!

ramona said...

Exactly where I am right now! It's hard to see the blessing in the extended wait for first call and my husband's more recent job loss. I'm impatient and anxious, feeling that time is quickly running out on the holding pattern my life is in.

Of course I know that's precisely where God is most clearly seen and where the Spirit's power is most potent. Still, I chaff and want to through away this time of blessing.

Thanks for the words of encouragement. I really needed to hear it!

emb said...

I'd like to know that myself. This past year has been one full of disguises, apparently. It's been very trying, with illnesses and job losses, and family worries. But, through it all, there has been a sense that everything was happening as it should. And, while it looked like a big pile of $@*! was dumping all over us, that big pile of $@*! is what helps beautiful things like flowers and trees to grow. So, though this past year the fertilizer has been plentiful, the shoots are finally beginning to push through the mess.

While it might be nice to have the the fabulous flora without all the fertilizer, that's just not the way things function in our world. And so, I can only imagine, must it be in others. I would love to be able to say I'm beginning to get used to the smell, but I think it's more the clothespin on my nose! Good thing the flowers will be worth it.

Thanks for the thoughts. I love that there is a place I can go for inspiration. And I always feel better after I've spent some time here.

jevcat said...

I have occasionally enquired of God couldn't I be taught what I need to learn through something pleasant for a change? The last year and a half has been grueling and has now become even more scary and uncertain. Thank you for this reminder.

jevcat said...

P.S. Not certain what it means, but the word floating in the security box to gain posting for that last comment was "devil".

Reverend Mom said...

You have my prayers as I have been working through this wilderness journey for about 3 years. My first call out of seminary was to close a congregation ... on Good Friday. At the time my call was ending, Beloved Husband left a very well paying job of 23 years to take a massive pay cut to go to work for our diocesan conference center. Down to one salary which was not enough to pay the mortgage and keep two teens in food. Did I mention there were no open calls in our diocese either? Stress didn't begin to describe it.

But in hindsight, God provided ... and we cut back spending to the bone! Call it a partnership. :-D Now I work as a chaplain for a local hospice and, while not what I trained to do, it has brought us blessings unexpected and in disguise.

God's fingerprints on these events aren't always obvious in the now but they are present. Keep wrestling!